The Cheap Seats Book Club: Leafs AbomiNation
Posted on September 14, 2009 - Filed Under culture |
The following is a lil’ book write-up I did for the sports blog thecheapseats.ca, where I ramble on semi-coherently from time to time.
As the 2009/2010 NHL season approaches, Toronto Maple Leafs fans (once again) prepare themselves for the unknown. While, as the late, great Joe Strummer said, the future is unwritten, a new book by two Hogtown scribes examines the sins of Leafs past to get a hint at where the club should head in the years ahead.
Leafs Abomination: The Dismayed Fan’s Handbook to Why the Leafs Stink and How They Can Rise Again by Dave Feschuk and Michael Grange is like a painful intervention. Far from having a grudge against the Leafs or their fans, the book does a great job of simply lining up all the facts – like a four decade long buffet of hockey incompetence and underachievement.
As a Leafs fan, it’s a lot like waking up hungover and having your friends recount every single transgression from the previous evening’s events in horrifying detail. I slept with who? In the ladies’ room? I drank pure gasoline? We killed a goat in ritual sacrifice in the backyard? Now imagine that night was 40 years long.
Much of the book is spent discussing the various whos and whats are to blame for the team’s perennial mediocrity. The most common theory being tied to the fans and goes something like: Because the fans keep shelling out for tickets and merchandise, the team continues to make money and therefore faces no financial threat when it underachieves. Feschuk and Grange formidably cover all the bases — from talking to Julian Sanchez at Pension Plan Puppets to waxing Leafs fandom with a big shot lawyer whose firm has a dozen season tickets and a luxury box — but don’t seem to find an answer. The reason for this may be because there isn’t one, not in this theory anyway.
They use the example of the Red Sox, a team that had a storied history and long-suffering fanbase not unlike the Leafs before winning the World Series in 2004. The Red Sox change in fortune came with a change in ownership and operating philosophy, NOT because of some mass exodus of fans or dip in merch sales.
Then there’s a rather far-fetched comparison to Newcastle United Football Club, its owner Mike Ashley and the way its fans have recently protested the club. The problem with this example is that the fan protest has gone exactly nowhere. It hasn’t motivated the owner any more to win, only convinced him to sell the club while simultaneously scaring away potential buyers. Oh, and then the club was relegated to the second division Championship league (the equivalent of the Leafs being dropped to the AHL after a crappy season) this season thanks to a bottom three finish last year. So what’s the point? If we’re going the English football route, why not compare the Leafs to other corporate or shareholder-owned squads that could put financial gain ahead of winning rather than a one-person owner structure? Take your pick of any number of teams – Arsenal, Manchester United, Liverpool, Tottenham Hotspur… Man United angered many fans a few years ago when it allowed American Malcolm Glazer (who also owns the NFL’s Tampa Bay Buccanneers) to become its majority stock holder. There was fan outrage. Some season ticket holders even left to start their own team. But in the end, where did all this “outrage” lead? What lessons did it teach the club? None. Zip. Zero. Sure the club kept winning but you would be hard-pressed to find a stronger incident of fan anger towards a storied sports brand than this, and yet it had zero effect on how the club was run.
Blaming the fans is a no-win proposition that only leads to the never-ending chicken-egg conversation. The easy theory goes that if all the fans gave up on the team, stopped going to games and buying Leafs swag, the owners would have an epiphany and suddenly hire great hockey minds who would only put great hockey players on the team, a Stanley Cup would be won and all would be right in the world. Except it’s never as simple as that, is it?
A worthwhile profile of the Detroit Red Wings under owner Mike Ilitch, pays tribute to the owner’s commitment to winning and loyalty to his staff. Current GM Ken Holland was a minor league goalie in the organization and many others have been in place for decades. But what if Holland sucked as a GM from the get-go? What if Yzerman never wore Red Wing red? There are more than a few factors conveniently unacknowledged that come closer to the surface when the spotlight shifts to Washington Capitals owner Ted Leonsis. The problem with using this profile as a Do to MLSEs perpetual Don’ts is that the Caps are still ultimately unproven. Sure they’re one of the most exciting teams in the league to watch, thanks to a plethora of young talent, but they – much like the Leafs – have won nothing. In terms of achievement, they’re ostensibly comparable to the pre-lockout Leafs teams that would venture just far enough into the playoffs to keep fans’ hope alive.
Eventually, Feschuk and Grange do move away from the blame-the-fans angle and look closer to where the blame really lies – incompetent hockey executives, from GMs to presidents to owners of seasons past – and then examine the present, where current GM Brian Burke enjoys (for now) the kind of autonomy and commitment of vision that perhaps was required all along.
In the end, the book is a solid read and a great wake-up call to many in Leafland. For Leaf-bashers, it’s a wealth of ammunition against a hated team. For those of Leafs Nation, it’s not meant to discourage one from following the Blue and White, but rather keep you informed as to exactly what and who you’ve been cheering for. If being a Leafs fan is an addiction, consider reading this book the first step to admitting your team has a problem. Which, as we all know, can be the first step to recovery.
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